At Forum, Men of Honor Share Marital Challenges, Romance, and Difficulties of Single Parenthood

The Voice of Cherubim under the leadership of Papa Coti Chapo will help round out the Men of Honor's week-long program.

 

The Voice of Cherubim under the leadership of Papa Coti Chapo will help round out the Men of Honor’s week-long program.

By Samuel O. Doku (Washington, DC). The Men of Honor continued with their program on Wednesday with a panel discussion that turned out to be an interesting and phenomenal forum with laughter, applause, and even empathy from the audience in the sanctuary of Amazing Love Church Ministry Int’l.

The panelists were Elder Donny Kamwa, who has been married to the same woman for over three decades, and they have five children, including twins; Min. Louis-Pierre Wese, who although not divorced, is single-handedly taking care of his three daughters; Mr. Cedric Kamwa, has been married for nearly three years and has one son, and Mr. Junior Ateufack Mekontchou, who is married for nearly two years now and has a child.

The panelists painted a glorious and romantic picture about their married lives and made marriage seem tantalizingly glamorous to bachelors and spinsters. They argued that the honorable institution of marriage could be sweet and enjoyable if there is enduring love and understanding between couples.

The discussion was particularly fruitful because statistics indicate that 50 percent of all marriages in America today end in divorce for first time

; it is 70 percent for those marrying for the second time, and eighty-percent for those in it for the third time. Money, children, and parents-in-law are among the chief reasons why many marriages hit the rocks.

The pristine issue Pastor Georges-William Ntemi wanted the panelists to discuss was how they make the Bible their frame of reference to solve their marital problems and challenges.

Elder Kamwa who is also the president of the Men’s Ministry, speaking through an interpreter because he wanted to sound impeccable in his delivery, cited Proverbs 31 as his frame of reference and pointed out, “My beautiful and gorgeous wife realizes she must be a replica of the virtuous woman in Prov. 31, so she supports me in everything.

“She realizes that any outward show of disrespect in front of the children could adversely impact the children, and they would start rebelling. Therefore, in arguments, she always takes the blame, even if I am wrong to ensure there is peace at home all the time.”

Pastor Georges-William called on Min. Wese to support his assertion that sometimes when children are advised and they refuse to take the wise counseling of their fathers, they should be left alone to make their mistakes so that they would learn from the errors of their ways.

In response, Min. Wese quoted Proverbs 4, and he read verses 4-6 and 20-20-22. “Get wisdom, get understanding; forget it not; neither decline from the words of my mouth. Forsake her not and she shall preserve thee; love her and she shall keep thee.

“My son attend to my words; incline thine ear unto my sayings. Let them not depart from thine eyes; keep them in the midst of thine heart. For they are life unto those that find them and health unto all their flesh.”

Min. Wese noted that if a father has taught his children to walk in the ways of God, but they become recalcitrant and decide to do things according to their own understanding and they go wrong, they could only learn from their errant ways and become better human beings.

He added that the best legacy fathers could leave for their children is by giving them education.

“Without a good education, no amount of wealth left for them would be well managed, and they would end up squandering all that has been left for them,” stated Min. Wese, who has five children spread across three continents. His son is a professor in England; his oldest daughter is in medical school in Africa, and his three youngest girls are here with him in the United States. One will start college in the Fall and the last two are still in high school.

“I feel blessed because God has been good to me,” said Min. Wese. “I had a difficult, even a problematic childhood, but by the grace of God, here I am today taking care of my three daughters,” he said.

Brother Cedric met his wife when both were students at Prince Georges Community College. After dating for a few months, they got married and have one son. “Transitioning from being single to married life can be difficult. But fortunately for me, when we first got married, we stayed with my parents for some time, so they helped us a lot.

“After a while, however, I decided we needed some privacy and we moved into our own apartment. Although I introduced my wife into the faith, she has grown stronger and more powerful in it, and she is helping me a lot. Sometimes, while she was praying, I would be in the gym exercising, but later I realized the folly of my ways, so now we pray together. If I come home, and she is praying I kneel beside her and we would pray together,” said Brother Cedric.

By mutual agreement, Brother Cedric’s wife started accompanying him to the gym to bring understanding into their marriage. They have their fair share of arguments like every married couple, but they don’t allow the sun to set on their anger and frustration because of the deep love they have for each other.

Brother Ateufack first saw his wife in a beauty salon, but he didn’t have the courage to approach her. God being wonderful, he was one day invited to a baby shower in Laurel, and lo and behold, there he saw her again. On seeing her again, he had butterflies in his stomach, but he gathered courage and approached her.

When he first asked her out, the first question she asked him was if he could cook. Fortunately for him, he is a really good cook, so when she popped the question, his response was swift and jovial but effective. Six months later, they were married, and they have one child with another on the way. Brother Ateufack revealed that his wife is a prayer warrior, so she helped him grow his faith in Christ. Both have become formidable members of Amazing Love Church Ministry Int’l.

After the impressive deliberations, Pastor Georges-William, who is the brain behind the Men of Honor’s celebration of their establishment, added that in every marriage, the two most important virtues that render it into a realm of success are love and respect. “If men will learn to love their wives from the bottom of their hearts and women would learn to respect their husbands, the astronomical divorce rate in this country would drop dramatically,” said the apostle of God.

Showering praises on honorable and blessed men of God is not an act of sycophancy because in God’s kingdom, there is no middle ground: you either love or hate. By the grace of God, I have decided to go with the former. Amen.

The two-day conference begins today from 7-9 p.m. with Pastor Jean Paul Ntap presenting. Tomorrow will be the turn of Evangelist Walters Asah, and on Sunday, the apostle of God will mount the podium of transfiguration to deliver the sermon. Also on Sunday, the Men of Honor will be led by the director of the choir, Mr. Coti Chapo and the Voice of Cherubim to give renditions of “We Shall Overcome,” The Lord Is Higher,” and “Double Double,” among others. They have been rehearsing for the past couple of weeks to get it right. The final rehearsal is tomorrow at 5 p.m.

Subscribe

About Dr. Sam Doku
Dr. Samuel O. Doku is a professor and a writer. He earned his Ph.D. in English with concentration in African American Literature from Howard University. He is a W.E.B. Du Bois scholar whose book is titled Cosmopolitanism in the Fictive Imagination of W.E.B. Du Bois: Toward the Realization of a Revolutionary Art. His articles have been published on Google Scholar, in the International Journal of English Language, Literature and Humanities, and College English Association Magazine (CEAMAG).